Posted by Missi on June 25, 19100 at 10:52:02:
In Reply to: To Susan: HELP! HUSBAND NOT ON BOARD Follow-Up posted by Missi on May 16, 19100 at 15:30:40:
Missi:
Thank you for your words or encouragement. I couldn't even bring myself to think about this for over a month. I finally brought it up again, and he is so against it. He'll consider it one more day and then he's through thinking about it. Basically, he's going to try to come up with a way to convince me that he's right about not trying again. It'll never happen... I feel so
awful. I told him I wouldn't fight him, but I feel so resentful.
: Susan,
: I just want to tell you that I have been in your situation. Dh was VERY supportive during my first two pregs (natural) but when we found out we needed intervention, he wasn't so sure. I can't tell you how many times I cried myself to sleep wondering why we are together if we don't agree on something so fundamental. I felt as if our relationship were crumbling because we were on "different pages" in our thoughts on children. It seemed that every day was a struggle because he thought I should "focus more on our children" and focus less on looking into our options for another. It hurt to hear that because I felt that I devoted my life to them and then to have him say something like that?
: It was very hard and a long, long road. All I can say is that I have been there and the only thing that changed his heart was time and prayer. I won't get into details on the prayer, but I can tell you that it has been three years since we have started "looking into" our options and we are just now in agreement. He was SO against any interventions that he would get mad if I even said the word baby. Then to top it off, his brother/sis in law got preg w/ twins on fertility meds and lost the boys when they were 15 days old. It was so hard on our family and dh was just sure that he couldn't go through that pain again, especially if it were ours that died. He didn't even want to risk that happening to us.
: I can tell you to have hope and keep believing, but nothing will get you through these hard times. I am very sorry that you have to go through this.
: Missi